I heard this yesterday...

I am part of the fellowship of the unashamed.

The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ. I won’t look back, let up, slow down, or back away.

My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, and my future is secure. I am finished and done with low living, sight walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed visions, mundane talking, cheap giving, and dwarfed goals.

I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotions, plaudits, or popularity. I now live by faith, lean on His presence, walk with patience, live by prayer, and labor with power.

My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven, my road is narrow, my way is rough, my companions are few, my Guide is reliable, my mission is clear. I cannot be bought, compromised, deterred, lured away, turned back, deluded, delayed or discouraged from the call of God.

I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of adversity, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder at the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity.

I won’t give up, shut up, let up, until I have stayed up, stored up and prayed up for the cause of Christ. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ.

I must go until He comes, preach until all know, and work until He stops me. And when He comes to get His own, He will have no problem recognizing me. My banner is clear.

I am a part of the fellowship of the unashamed.

Wow! what a challenge.

Sticking with things

Well I finished Numbers tonight. That felt good. And so far I've only missed a couple of days on my 365 Project on Flickr. Seeing as I'm usually not great at keeping at things both of these accomplishments feel pretty good.

A thought from the second to last ch. of Numbers... The Reubenites didn't want to go across the Jordan and enter the Promised Land because of their "flocks". God is calling me to enter into His blessing and experience all the great things He has for me. What is there in my life that I'm holding onto and that keeps me back? Do I have any "flocks" I need to sacrifice so that I'll be ready to go where ever God wants? Any possessions that I'm clinging so tightly to that God can't bless me the way He wants? Hmmmmm, food for thought.

follow up

So I've been doing the 365 portrait thing for just over two weeks... It is really hard to think of creative ideas and to actually take time to "create" images, that is to take pictures and then tweak them digitally is really time consuming. Still, I think it is a great exercise and I still hope it will grow me as a photographer.

Today is the day often known Good Friday. I dunno how good 5 inches of snow can be in the end of March. My fingers are aching to get into the earth. I guess we'll have to wait a bit longer.

Well, I'm falling asleep... I could just go to bed... There is more on my mind that I want tosay but it ll have to hake.

CAUTION - Christians under construction!

Waow! What a day I had today. Along with struggling with my own attitudes, fears and temptations, I had a SHOCKING conversation with a dear old Christian woman this morning.

At the nursing home I run we decided to rearrange the dining room seating chart. Some folks had asked for changes and we thought it might be nice to institute a twice a year change to help folks make new friends...plus for the alert folks who get tired of hearing the same stories every meal, well ...

These two sister however, had a CONNIPTION yesterday when we rolled out the new seating chart. We seated them with two nice guys, one of whom they go to church with... well, after an embarrassing scene in the dining room, I tried to appease them with the promise of a visit. I missed them yesterday so finally went up to chat with them about it this morning.

I couldn't believe my ears. The disdain for overweight people, the mockery of their peers with Parkinson's or other debilitating diseases was unfathomable. I couldn't contain myself and had to rebuke them. I hope I did so in a gentle way because I know I'm far from perfect but this was so ..... waow!

Lord, let my speech be seasoned, as it were, with grace.

better than John Brown

Why do I struggle with contentment so much? I remember reading "Hinds feet on high places" and being struck with how nature reveled in being just what God intended it to be... A stream alway running lower and lower, a blossom lasting just a day or two... Tonight I read in Isaiah 49, "It is too small a thing for you to be my servant?"

I really want that to be enough. And it should be. I mean, wow, look at people clamoring to be the next American Idol, or that awful show they advertise during AI, Moment of Truth... People destroying their lives and relationships for a few dollars. I get to serve the God of all heaven. If I want, if I'm willing to do what it takes, I could get to be close enough to Him to know what His most heartfelt desires!!! And is it too small a thing for me to be His servant.

John Brown was a simple Scotsman who served Queen Victoria at Balmoral Castle. Through his friendship and care he became one of the Queen's most trusted and privileged servants. How much greater my potential privilege.

God’s terrible insistence on human freedom is so absolute that He granted us the power to live as though He does not exist. Philip Yancey.

I read that in Our Daily Bread last week and thought of it again reading Isaiah 46 this week...

I make known the end from the beginning, from ancient times, what is still to come. I say: My purpose will stand, and I will do all that I please. Isa 46:10

I am still wrestling with the Sovereignty of God and human freedom and how they interplay. I am beginning to see that more often than not, I want God to grant me freedom, and then be Sovereign in those areas where I think He should.

Is this a common human struggle? Everyone else seems to have their act together. I still struggle to understand, to obey, to trust, to love the way I should. For now, in my weakness, I find I just say, do what You think is best in my life and help my unbelief. I often think of the man who said, Lord, if your willing... I try not to think of that too much. There are other reasons I suppose why God does not act, sin in my life, disobedience, lessons I need to learn, patience to be developed, but still, one would love to see clear, obvious, unmistakable , irrefutable answers to specific prayers. I guess I am not so much doubting as worrying... I guess fretting is still a sin, but I never realized what a worrier I am... My fellow small groupers say it's because I am controlling. I guess I am. That's something else I didn't really recognize till this last few months.... I mean, not really realized, like I am starting to...

Well, TRUTH... what can I hang onto in all my doubts and struggles? God is in control (I may not always like it or agree - but He's bigger and smarter than me by immeasurable contrast) God loves me. The Bible says so, the cross says so. He will never leave me. Life is short and heaven is forever. There is grace available to me for even the problem of doubt, if only I will accept it... My mind will be kept in perfect peace, if it is fixed on God...