bike ride

It's my busyness

Regardless of how I may aspire to ease my busyness as seen in the post below or other grand aspirations, I never quite seem able to put it into practice in my own life... Take the last week as an example...
Wednesday - Worked till 5:00, ran home and grabbed a bite to eat then off to AWANA, finally home and quiet by 9:00
Thursday - Worked till 5:00 then to Circuit City to see about fixing Carol's laptop screen which one of the boys accidentally kicked and it blew out, then 25 minutes north to friends Joy and Joe for supper then home and quiet by 10:00
Friday - Worked till 5:00 then had a board meeting and that ran till after 10 p.m. Helped clean up so I didn't get home till about 10:30 but Alex was at a sleep over and needed me to bring his clothes and a movie so I didn't really get home and settled till nearly midnight...
Saturday - Up early for Christmas program practice and then spent the early part of the day cleaning the house. If I remember Saturday evening was a more quiet evening... but it's a bit fuzzy.
Sunday - After church we ran out for lunch and errands and didn't get home till nearly five. Sunday evening is also a bit fuzzy but i think I vegged...
Monday - Came home and cleaned the house a bit, began cleaning up the yard till supper. After supper Carol went out to work on school stuff so I settled the kids then worked on my office redecoration project till after 10 p.m.
Tuesday - After work I came home and did some more leaf clean up then had a bite of supper then went out for French club... After French club I stopped at the store for Carol. When I got home I did some laundry and cleaning and settled down about 10 p.m.

And so it goes... I'm not complaining, but I don't know how without just giving up on life...

Emmy Rossum on life being too busy.

Slow me
Slow me down
Rushing and racing and running in circles
Moving so fast I’m forgetting my purpose
Blur of the traffic is sending me spinning
Getting no where
My head and my heart are colliding chaotic
Pace of the world
I just wish I could stop it
Try to appear like I’ve got it together
I’m falling apart
Save me
Somebody take my hand
And lead me
Slow me down
Don’t let love pass me by
Just show me how
Cause I’m ready to fall
Slow me down
Don’t let me live a lie
Before my life flies by
I need you to slow me down
Sometimes I fear that I might
Disappear in the blur of fast forward
I falter again
Forgetting to breathe
I need to sleep
I’m getting nowhere
All that I’ve missed I seen in the reflection
Pass me while I wasn’t paying attention
Tired of rushing, racing, and running
I’m falling apart
Tell me
Oh won’t you take my hand
And lead me
Slow me down
Don’t let love pass me by
Just show me how
Because I’m ready to fall
Slow me down
Don’t let me live a lie
Before my life flies by
I need you slow me down
Just show me I need you to slow me down
The noise of the world
Is getting me caught up
Chasing the clock
And I wish I could stop it
Just need to breathe
Somebody please slow me down

Cow droppings

do you ever feel like a giant cow dropping? sometimes life can be so overwhelming, things happen or people say things to you or about you and it makes you feel about as loved as a pile of steaming cow dung.

It is weird what a roller coaster life can be. Tonight I went out to a coffee shop and wow, the sunset was so breath taking. I just felt absolutely stunned and compelled to worship... But a few hours later the cynicism and criticism I was experiencing felt like a physical thing... I could literally feel the joy and peace and contentment being sucked out of me. I simply had to remove myself from the situation.

So here I sit... wanting to recall that sunset... wanting to recall the breathless feeling that filled my chest that a thing, a created thing could be so lovely, so powerful that words or pictures would not do it justice.

It turned my thoughts to the Creator. If this night, this sunset, could be so beautiful; what must the Creator look like? The clouds in an indescribable shade of pinkish, orangish, mauve swept up from the horizon. The sun was not visible at all, only the effect of it on the clouds. I thought about the songs of the angels and creatures described in the Bible... They surround the throne of the King and their praise, their strong, majestic voices sweeps up into the sky above the throne like those clouds. I wonder if like northern lights the beauty of their songs, the beauty of the voices colors the sky, rippling and billowing like a high sail...

And if the angels and the creatures who see the King are so full of His songs, so full of His praises... why am I so earth bound? So distracted and manipulated by the mean spiritedness of my fellow man...

I wonder what God in His heaven must look like if His created earth is so beautiful... I can't wait to see Him and find out.

I wish I was there again...

My NJ trip...

There were a few highlights... and some low lights... I was really bummed that I didn't get to see one of my very dear friends Nikki...

I enjoyed the chance to catch up with my brother and his family and to meet my nephew's girlfriend. Her name is Heather. She seemed really sweet.

The primary reason for my being in NJ was to represent my senior community to pastors and bible teachers at a conference. I didn't have as many opportunities as I would have liked but I really enjoyed a couple of the messages I heard. In particular one guy talked about the need for love and what love looks like... His context was in church leadership, but I considered it in the context of my marriage and my leadership role at my nursing home. Consider the following challenges:

i. Am I selfish toward my wife/fellow worker?
ii. Am I long suffering with my wife/co-workers?
iii. Am I gentle toward my wife and coworkers?
iv. Am I secretly envious of my wife or co-workers?
v. Am I trying to be impressive in front of my spouse or fellow workers?
vi. Am I trying to be superior to my wife or co-workers?
vii. Am I rude to my wife or co-worker?
viii.Do I have a secret agenda with my wife or co-workers?
ix. Am I easily offended by my wife or fellow workers?
x. Do I try and think the best of my wife and co-workers or do I assume the worst of them?
xi. Am I enduring in loyalty toward my wife and co-workers?

I was really challenged.